Resurfacing MemoriesTry to keep the fake smile pasted there,Curved upward lips, people don't even care,Then listen to my music and wander why,As a tear slowly falls from my eye.The pushed back thoughts try to resurface,About the most important person I do miss,The person I love and really care about,The one whos' voice I can hear shout.I can still hear the shouts from the night years ago,"The signs of my overdose are starting to show,"Please help me I'm dying" I hear you call,Yet all I can do is curl up in a ball.The morning after, an ambulance pulls up outside,Paramedics run up the stairs to where you lie,Take you to the hospital where you will stay,Till your stomach is pumped, till you feel better in some way. What if that night in your bed you did die?I would be responsible for not saving your life,Now I'm not around to hear when you cry,So what if there's a next time where you will die?I can't lose fears it will happen again,My only problem is I don't know when,Because
AloneWhen your tears start to fall,For no reason at all,You have amazing friends,Who will be there till the end,Yet the tears continue to fall.When your screams become trapped inside,That is where they will hide,You're asked what is wrong,But you don't say cause it's long,So the screams remain trapped inside.When your thoughts turn to fears,After all these years,They come back to haunt you,Even though all that is through,The thoughts still turn to fears.When you want to go where the fears lie,Because there you no longer want to cry,Because she's safe and that's just fine,But she still keeps going over the line,And you still want to go where your fears lie.
A stride into the futureAcceptance letters on the wall,A rejected heart still left to fall,Accepted under conditions I will not meet,The more I try the further away I get,The longer I work the less I know,Sit a test I've revised too long for,Only to stare at the paper and not understand,Leave dotted lines alone with no words upon them,I can already predict my grade without the teacher seeing it.What's the point trying, when it's getting me nowhere?What's the point wasting all this time?Reading complicated words,Numbers scattered,Because I understand none of it,University seems like a jump over a canyon,And my practice strides are getting smaller,Smaller
smaller... practically a step now,I'm so scared of falling down into the bottomless pit.
A Girl I'll Never KnowA death note read out in the classroom,A fellow student has passed away, Blank looks, blank feelings, blank mood,A feeling of sorrow seeps through the room,The Corridor, the Hall, the College.My uplifted mood quickly drops,A girl I did not know in the year below,But still, my thoughts go to her family,Her friends, her loved ones, her teachers.I cannot imagine how they feel,To lose someone so close,To not realise her spiralling down into;Darkness, Despair, Death.The feeling still lingers the next day,Read the bulletin and sink down,Something nobody wants to know,Depression, Bulimia, Suicide.I think it increased awareness,Made the college somehow closer,People won't forget this death in a hurry,Rest In Peace to the girl I'll never know.